They Had It All

Twenty years ago, British journalist Valerie Grove decided to interview women who “had it all” for at least 25 years. She defined having it all as:

"...they had to have been married for more than 25 years and have had three or more children, as well as a brilliant career."

She turned her findings into a book, The Compleat Woman: Marriage, Motherhood, Career - Can She Have It All? Her conclusion was that it was very rare for a woman to be able to successfully juggle a husband, children and successful career.

Now, a British newspaper has marked the twentieth anniversary of the book’s publication by going back and interviewing some of the women whose lives were chronicled in it to see if they think it’s gotten any easier to “have it all.” The very interesting (and lengthy) article is worth reading, but if you’re pressed for time, I’d like to share a couple of key points these women now make, as they look back on their lives from the vantage point of old age.

1) Women try too hard to give their children the perfect childhood.

Author Faye Weldon, 77 and the mother of four sons, says:

"Today, we try to fight that destiny and give our children the perfect childhood in the hopes that it will make them perfect. I think children are the better for a little healthy neglect. Mine certainly were.”

I don’t think she means neglect in a bad way. What she’s saying is that if we give our kids more autonomy and stop trying to micromanage their activities, they’ll do just fine and we’ll be less exhausted. This is a point we homeschooling moms, who are already involved personally in our children’s daily education, need to take to heart.

2) Women should realize they can have a career while raising children, but it won’t be easy, and the children must come first.

Shirley Hughes, 80, the mother of three children and a well-known children’s author, recalls writing at home with children underfoot:

“…despite publishing more than 50 books, Hughes managed without a nanny.
"I would have been too jealous of her relationship with my children," she explains.
"We did have au pairs to help out domestically, but I would never have left them in sole charge of the children all day…..But fractured concentration due to interruptions from children is the bane of a working mother's life, especially if you work from home as I did.
"But it was the right thing for me. I was able to be there for my children, and so glad I was self-employed and did not have to disappear off for long days away from the home."

3) Women expect to have too many material things that don’t matter in the long run.

Sheila Kitzinger, 80, a mother of five grown daughters and honored by the British government for her years of work for the National Childbirth Trust, says:

"Women now think they need so much more. Everyone must have a second car in the family.”
She also seconds Ms. Weldon’s concern about providing a wealth of perfect educational experiences:
“But also, we feel the need to do so much more with our children. There are constant educational trips - must see the Tutankhamun exhibition, must see the Chinese warriors at the British Museum.
"It's relentless, exhausting and very expensive."

Ms. Hughes agrees:

"Perhaps women think today they need to have too much. We all say we work because we need the money, but are there sacrifices to be made.
"Perhaps not having a second car; maybe moving to live somewhere cheaper.
"It's very sad when people think they cannot afford to have more children. What do you regret at the end of your life? Is it the expensive stuff, or not having a child?"

According to the article, these women with such successful careers look back over their lives and see where their time was best invested: in their husbands and children. As Ms. Hughes put it:

"My only regrets are that I got too bogged down with getting the shopping and household chores. I should have let it all go to pot a lot more than I did.
"What I wish I'd done more of is sitting and talking to my children round the kitchen table.
"And conversations with my husband, too, now that I'm widowed. Once your husband dies, that is what you long for above all.
"But when you're young and busy with work and family, you are always rushing on to the next thing. That's life."

We can all learn from those who have come before us. And with that, I’d better go make dinner and spend some time enjoying it with my family :)

Disabled and Gifted

Since I have a teenage son with Down syndrome, I do know something about having a child with a disability, but I only really know about his specific issue. There are many other disabilities that I know little or nothing about.

One of those disabilities is autism. My cousin has a son who’s six weeks older than mine and he’s autistic. But I’ve only met him a few times because we live pretty far apart. I also have a homeschooling friend whose youngest son is autistic, but again, I’ve only seen him once or twice because we don’t live near them.

So I wouldn’t say I’m familiar with autism, but I have to admit that stories like this one fascinate me. To be able to recreate a scene with so much detail from memory is just completely amazing, and an incredible gift.

A Great Carnival.......

The April Fool's Day Edition of the Carnival of Homeschooling is up, and I'm not tricking you when I say it's really well done. The Cates used real April Fool's Day pranks from history as the framework for this week's carnival, and it's so interesting. My personal favorite? The prank involving San Serriffe....a publisher's dream vacation spot, LOL.

Our Entrepreneurial Homeschooler

Way back when I read the book that turned me on to homeschooling, Home Grown Kids by Dr. Raymond and Dorothy Moore, and then their subsequent books, one of the things the Moores described that fascinated me was the opportunity homeschooled children had for entrepreneurship. My older kids were babies then, but I could just picture them someday sitting behind their own little lemonade stand.

They did have lemonade stands when they got older, and I remember one summer when they made a killing by selling cold pop and homemade brownies to people attending one of our garage sales. One of our daughters also sold handmade cards door-to-door. I’m sure there were other entrepreneurial experiments that I’ve since forgotten.

They learned so much from those experiences, and lemonade stands were just the tip of the iceberg. Back when I first read that book, how could I (or the Moores) have foreseen the advent of the Internet and its usefulness for entrepreneurs of all ages? Indeed, I never would have imagined that I would someday be writing and selling my own homeschooling books via the Internet.

Well, homeschooled children have that same opportunity, and our dd16 has taken up the challenge. She’s gotten so many compliments on the funny stuffed fabric creatures she makes that she recently set up her own online shop to sell them. She’s still in the process of adding her products to her shop, but already has quite a few creatures online. You can see her shop here. Feel free to look around; she loves having visitors browse her shop :)

This has been a great exercise for her. She keeps track of all her expenses very carefully, including the time it takes her to make each creature (around two hours including design time). She’s careful to use her raw materials conservatively (no waste). It took her a while to figure out how to use etsy.com, and she discovered that the site offers very cleverly designed virtual forums where she can learn more about marketing her wares. All of this has taken a lot of time, but being homeschooled, she has more free time than she would if she were in high school all day.

She's in 11th grade, and we’ve been studying economics (Basic Economics by Thomas Sowell, excerpt here) since the fall. But I have to think that the things she’s learning right now by setting up her little business are at least as valuable, if not more so, than what she’s learning from Dr. Sowell’s book. Add in the dinner time discussions her dad and I have about our own businesses, and I have to think she’s fortunate to learn real-life economics in her daily life. That she has the time for all of this is yet another blessing of homeschooling.

What Do YOU Think?

Presales of the new book are going great, and I'm starting to look ahead to the next few projects, now that this one is at the printer.

I have one book halfway done; it's about preparing our children for uncertain times in our economy. I will enjoy finishing that book, but most of the research is already done, so I need a new topic for the book after that.

I had one idea which was recently brought to my mind again by a writer who needed some info from me for an article she was writing. Said article just came out, and reading it has made me think harder about the topic: preschool. I'm thinking of expanding on "Preschool Pressure or Preschool Peace." What do you think? Is this an issue that needs further discussion?

What the World Needs Now.....Some Good News

Henry Cate of Why Homeschool has declared today to be Good News Thursday. Here's what he's asking bloggers to do today:

Much of the news today is depressing. Newspaper headlines tell us about awful things happening in our neighborhood, at the national level, and around the world.

I want to try something different. I invite you to join with me in focusing on good news. This can be as local as your baby taking his first step or you saw the first flower of spring. It could as earth shattering as someone has solved world hunger or there is a break through in a Grand Unification Theory. It could be some new insight you had about a topic you are studying, or life.

If you are interested, you can add your post via Mr. Linky.

Even if you don't have a post to share, head on over to Henry's and read some uplifting posts so you can have a Good News Thursday.

Such a Deal

The Old Schoolhouse Magazine is offering its Spring Promotion again this year. You get 25 free bonus gifts when you buy a $25 one-year subscription. The prizes are $550 worth of actual products donated by homeschool companies. That's a pretty good deal. You can learn more here.

Spring Break!

We're taking this week off of school for our spring break. The funny thing about doing so is that it doesn't seem much different than an ordinary day except that the kids were allowed to sleep late and we didn't do any bookwork.

Otherwise, dh and I have been busy working, dd16 is hard at work on her new etsy store (she sells adorably silly stuffed animals that she sews; I'll have a link soon) and novel #2, and dsds15 is enjoying the fact that he was able to watch "The Flintstones" in the morning instead of waiting until after we're done with his school work.

We did travel to see family over the weekend and just got back yesterday, but today it seems as though we never left. Just another day....time flies when you're having fun!

My Newsletter is Up!

Well, I'm a bit late with it this month, thanks to being busy getting the new book to the printer, but my March newsletter has gone out to all subscribers, and can be read here if you're not a subscriber.

Since it's so late, it's actually the March/April edition this time. I did include a few extra things in it, so it's a bit larger than usual. If you'd like a free subscription, just sign up here.

P.S. So far, the most popular article from this issue has been "Take Control of Your Family Schedule." Interesting.....

Why the California Ruling Affects ALL Parents

I’m almost afraid to write about the recent California court decision that has freaked out many homeschoolers in that state as well as everywhere else, because most of the things being said about it can be found all over the blogosphere by now.

But columnist Ken Blackwell has makes an important point about this landmark ruling that we parents (not just homeschooling parents but ALL parents) need to be aware of:

It has been nearly 20 years since the United Nations first agreed to codify the Convention of the Rights of the Child into international law and since that time, America has been only one of two member states of the United Nations to have not ratified the Convention.

The California case is a perfect example of why America has not ratified the treaty……..

But, as Blackwell goes on to emphasize in his column, the NEA is a supporter of that U.N. Convention and would love to see us ratify it. If you don’t know what it’s all about, you need to read up on it. The short version is that the “rights” it grants to children are built on the removal of parental rights. And that’s what the California appellate ruling is all about, taking away the right of parents to teach their children.

I’m glad Blackwell is bringing up this aspect of the story, and I hope it gains some legs. I find it even more important than other angles of this story, though they’re certainly not minor issues. Besides the homeschooling aspect, they include:

1) Requiring homeschooling parents to be certified teachers could ultimately hurt private schools, which do not always insist on that requirement for their own teachers.

2) Requiring teachers to be certified could also be applied to substitute teachers. The NEA does not state that California requires substitute teachers to be certified, but they must have a bachelor’s degree at a minimum. This site comes right out and states that CA substitutes don’t have to be certified. If, as this article mentions, the California teacher’s union's members think all students should be taught by certified teachers, shouldn’t CA substitutes be certified before they go after homeschool parents?

3) To become certified in California, you must take the CBEST exam. I’ve written about this before: that test is a joke. See for yourself.

Our New Book Is On Its Way!

Our new book is finally at the printers! That's right, The Imperfect Homeschooler's Guide to Homeschooling will be available in softcover in a few short weeks, probably early April.

We began selling this title as an eBook last year. We got lots of great feedback on it, but the thing we heard most is, "I want a print copy!" So we began work on that last summer, but our move from IL to WI really slowed things down.

It also took a while because we added so much information to the eBook version (which has been kept in its entirety). The eBook was just over 100 pages, while the print version is 192 pages. You can see the table of contents at the book's page over at the Cardamom Publishers site.

If you'd like to pre-order this book, just go here for a pre-publication special that includes a discounted price and free shipping. As soon as the books get here, we will send your copy right out to you.

This book is chock-full of what I've learned over 20 years of homeschooling our four children. I hope it will be a blessing to you :)

Recognizing the Supremacy of the Free Market

Playwright David Mamet made the news this week with his announcement that he is "no longer a 'brain-dead' liberal." As I read his lengthy explanation of how he determined this, something in it jumped out at me:


For the Constitution, rather than suggesting that all behave in a godlike manner, recognizes that, to the contrary, people are swine and will take any opportunity to subvert any agreement in order to pursue what they consider to be their proper interests.

To that end, the Constitution separates the power of the state into those three branches which are for most of us (I include myself) the only thing we remember from 12 years of schooling.


How interesting that Mamet, a celebrated writer of multiple well-known works, would so casually mention this, as though it were public knowledge: "which are for most of us (I include myself) the only thing we remember from 12 years of schooling."

He is blatantly acknowledging that he remembers very little of his pre-college schooling experience, and he believes most people don't remember much of theirs, either. So what's the purpose of school then? If you don't remember learning anything beyond the three branches of U.S. government, was it really worth your time?

Later in the essay he makes a statement, used in a different context than where I'm going with it, of course, that speaks volumes:

The play, while being a laugh a minute, is, when it's at home, a disputation between reason and faith, or perhaps between the conservative (or tragic) view and the liberal (or perfectionist) view. The conservative president in the piece holds that people are each out to make a living, and the best way for government to facilitate that is to stay out of the way, as the inevitable abuses and failures of this system (free-market economics) are less than those of government intervention.

I took the liberal view for many decades, but I believe I have changed my mind.

Government should stay out of the way, because the failings of the free market are less than those of government intervention....this is also true of education! We've seen what has happened with government-controlled education. The removal of schools from local control so many years ago made things worse, not better.

A free market, where parents are free to choose (with their dollars) how they will educate their children, whether via public-, private-, home-or un-schooling, can do much better than governmental control of education, and can certainly do no worse. Maybe Mamet will come to that conclusion on his own and someday become a mouthpiece for the free market in education. Why not? He's on the right path now.

If This Doesn't Give You Chills, You Might Want to Check Your Pulse to See If You're Still Alive......

This is a good video for our kids, to teach them that you should never give up on your dreams. Simon Cowell was so impressed with Paul Potts that he's going to produce a movie about him.

For Lutheran Homeschoolers

We've been homeschoolers for many years, but we've been Missouri Synod Lutherans even longer.

Back when I began homeschooling my kids, I looked for a Lutheran Bible curriculum, but was disappointed to find that while the LCMS' Concordia Publishing House did have a Bible curriculum, it was intended only for Lutheran schools, and so I was unable to purchase individual copies to use with my children.

But times change, and I recently learned that CPH is now reaching out to homeschoolers. My son, who works for CPH, sent me a link to Lutheran homeschooling resources at CPH. The materials aren't just for Lutherans, though.....many Christian homeschoolers would like what CPH offers.

New Carnival

This week's Carnival of Homeschooling is up, and it's a doozy. Not only does it include a variety of posts, but there's a special section regarding the California issue (questions about the legality of homeschooling in CA since a recent court ruling that homeschooling parents must be certified teachers). All homeschoolers, no matter where they live, should be aware of what's happened in that state.

BTW, here's an interesting take on the California issue.

Road Trip

Just got back from a short trip…..well, short in terms of time (five days) but not distance (1400 miles).

We started off early Wednesday morning en route to Fort Wayne, IN, where we spent the night. The next morning we drove through Amish country to a small town where my dh’s family is from. We had a wonderful time visiting with relatives from both sides of his family. When we arrived, we found out that if we’d come a day earlier, we would have found ourselves driving in a terrible ice storm.

On Friday we headed to St. Louis. It started to snow right when we left, but the roads weren’t bad, and by the time we left Indianapolis, the snow had stopped. The area we drove through would get between 12 and 20 inches of snow over the next 24 hours. Once again, great timing. I can’t take credit for these instances of missing hazardous weather except for the fact that I did pray for good travel before we left, more than once. :)

It took most of the day to get to St. Louis, where we visited our son at work, met some of his very nice coworkers, and saw his place of business. He loves his job, and we’re very happy to see that.

Dinner was prepared by our son and his bride; it was delicious. We visited them again the next day, and went to church with them and her family. Since we haven’t found a church home yet, we really enjoyed being there. Then we all went back to the newlyweds’ apartment, where we dined on frozen pizza and birthday cake, because it was dsds15’s birthday. That’s right, my youngest is 15. This makes me feel somewhat old. But it’s always a celebration, because we weren’t sure he would make it through his first week of life because of the problems he developed soon after birth.

We left for home very early the next morning (ugh, time change Sunday made it even harder to get up early) and arrived home in time for dinner last night.

Some observations about the trip back:

1) Gas prices are ridiculously high. We even saw diesel at over $4 a gallon.
2) I finally tried using the cruise control on our car and liked it. I’d always avoided it because I thought I would be less alert if I didn’t have to concentrate on staying near the speed limit (not one of my strengths). But it didn’t work out that way. I stayed awake the whole time I drove…always a good thing.
3) In addition to all the great home-cooked food shared with us by family members, we also ate at restaurants and fast food places while on the road. I find that as I get older, I like fast food less and appreciate home cooking much more.
4) You can get really tired of the same six CDs when you drive 1400 miles in five days. Not that they weren’t great CDs (Carly Simon, WOW’s Best of Gospel, Paul McCartney, Chicago, Earth, Wind and Fire, and Count Basie), but we heard them too many times.

So that’s where I’ve been lately. And if you hung on all the way through to the end of this post, you must be avoiding the dinner dishes or something because it’s not a very exciting post. ;)

This Week's Carnival of Homeschooling...

looks like another great one. Hosted by PalmTree Pundit, it has something for everyone. See for yourself!

Worth the Interruption

The usual routine around here is that we do school in the morning. I start off working with dd16 for a while, and then she goes off to work independently while I work with dsds14, who needs pretty much constant supervision. We do that until lunch, and after lunch I work.

Today after lunch I took off for the post office to ship some books, then made quick stops at the bank and the video store. After I got home, I had about five minutes in front of the computer screen before dd16 popped into the office to ask for help with an essay question in her economics book.

This led us to discuss the issue for a good 20 minutes, which was occasionally punctuated by her comments expressing continued confusion. So I kept talking, bringing in points made in the book (which is Basic Economics by Thomas Sowell, in case you’re interested). And all of a sudden, she caught on.

She then wrote up her answer to the question, and when I checked it, I could see that she had come to the point of understanding.

I think this is one of the greatest advantages of homeschooling. You start out with a student you already know very well, and over the years you come to know them even better. So when they ask you for help with something, you know how to approach the issue and how to help them with it.

Since you’re not on a class schedule, you can sit and work with them for as long as it takes until they reach the point of understanding. Sometimes it happens quickly, and other times it takes some extra effort. But there is great satisfaction in knowing that you helped bring them to the point of understanding, however long it might take.

However, it also means that you will be interrupted in the middle of your work at times. But as much as I may love what I do, I always keep in mind that my main job is homeschooling.

Perfectly Understandable, Considering the Source

An Israeli researcher has declared that Moses was high when he thought he heard God issue the Ten Commandments.

Benny Shanon, a professor in Jerusalem, does not believe that great Biblical event actually happened. I think the explanation behind Professor Shanon's ridiculous proclamation lies in this sentence from an article about him and his beliefs:

Moses was probably also on drugs when he saw the "burning bush," suggested Shanon, who said he himself has dabbled with such substances.

Drug users....is there anything they don't know? (With apologies to Homer Simpson)

Back to Basics

Every time I go to the grocery lately, I freak out at the prices going up while the package sizes shrink. This reminds me of the late 1970s, when I was a newlywed. Being college students, we were on a very tight budget. Seeing food prices go up regularly back then made me realize that I had to learn to stretch a dollar.

Raising four kids on a single income in the intervening years helped me stay in good financial shape when it comes to stretching those dollars. So it's second nature to do what I can to keep the grocery bill from going over budget.

I saw soup on sale for $1.50 a can last week. That's crazy.....$1.50 for a couple bowls of oversalted soup with supposed meat in it. That put me in the mood to make homemade soup, and for a few dollars more than that one can of soup, I made a big batch that covered dinner for four plus lunch the next day.

Then there's baking mix. I don't buy the name brand because the company that makes it supports Planned Parenthood, the largest provider of abortions in the U.S. I just cannot give them money and consider myself a good steward. Fortunately I have a lovely book full of recipes for name-brand products, and one of them is for baking mix. I made some over the weekend, and now I have a nice big plastic box of baking mix in the pantry: twice the quantity for half the price of the name brand. It makes me smile every time I walk past it.

The Truth About China

So China is starting to rethink its one child policy. In case you didn't know, for years China has used forced abortions to keep its population at one child per family in the city and two children per family in the country. Since boys are considered more valuable than girls there, baby girls are often found lying on the roadside, left to die, while parents try again for a boy before they reach the limit.

This quote from an article about the possible policy change has got to be the understatement of the year:

China says its policies have prevented several hundred million births and boosted prosperity....

"Prevented"? That's one way to say it.

So, the Chinese government is obviously ok with murdering several hundred million people in order to become more prosperous. Let's all think about that the next time we buy something made in China. We're supporting a murderous regime.

Homeschool vs. Public School

Every week I receive a free newsletter, “The Homeschool Minute,” from The Old Schoolhouse magazine. It’s a nice little email, and I recommend it, despite all the promotional emails they send you after you subscribe. (You can subscribe here.)

This week’s topic is “Comparing Yourself to the Public School—As In Don’t.” Great topic, and there are several interesting takes on it by the assorted columnists of THM.

However, I have to admit that I’ve compared our homeschool to public school many times. One of the reasons I’ve remained so committed to homeschooling, even when it gets tough, is that I remember my own years in public school, and never, not even on my worst homeschooling day, have I wanted to send my kids there.

To me, public school meant boredom, long hours watching a clock whose minute hand moved in super slow-motion. I remember staring out the window as the teacher droned on, feeling jealous of the birds that could fly freely.

Sometimes, public school meant fear. In grammar school, I was afraid of the boy who punched me in the stomach for no reason. In junior high, I dreaded the annual gymnastics unit in P.E., where I was forced to display, in front of the entire class, my inability to turn a cartwheel or do a backflip.

Later on, in high school, public school meant anger…my anger at the injustice of the situation. It wasn’t fair to be cooped up in classrooms when there were so many interesting things going on in the world. It was demeaning to be 16 and have to ask for a pass to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water. It made me mad that the school staff insisted good grades were important yet gave all the attention and perks to the varsity football team.

Homeschooling meant my kids didn’t have to go through the boredom and the fear and the anger. It meant they had far more freedom as children than I ever had. Once we had completed our daily work, they could do what they wanted.

I remember watching my son lying on the foyer floor and thinking how happy he looked, deep in thought as he drew a very detailed picture of space creatures on a huge piece of drafting paper my husband had given him. Or my daughter, inhaling books as soon as she got them home from the public library and begging for more by that evening. And even today, my younger daughter, now a teen, sits knitting while I read her Economics book aloud. She says she can think more clearly when her hands are busy; she’s an auditory learner. I doubt most high school teachers would let her knit in class.

Then there’s my youngest, the one with Down syndrome. Unlike the disabled kids who went to school with me, my son has never been pushed or tripped in the hallway. He’s never been called the “R” word. He trusts people to love him, because he’s surrounded by love every day.

So yes, I’m afraid I’m guilty of comparing our homeschool to public school many times over the past twenty years. And every single time, homeschooling comes up smelling like a rose.

This Week's Carnival of Homeschooling...

...is now up over at SuperAngel's Blog. She has used the theme of "Political Parties of Our Government," and I was happy to see she put my post in a section I can live with (you'll have to go over there to see what I mean!)

The View When We Do School

We "do school" in the dining room, and this is our view from the table. On the left is a clock my husband made recently. (The bridge in the background of the clock face is the one here in town.) On the right is a frame he made, and it holds a glass mosaic made by dd24. They are planning to sell both his clocks and their framed mosaics this summer (we live in a tourist area called Door County).

In the middle is our sign of spring: the first of the five pots of bulbs I planted last fall. I love to force bulbs. You just plant a few pots of them in the fall, keep them some place dark and very cold over the winter (we used the garage cupboards), water them once a week or so, and come early spring, you have flowers! This particular pot is full of daffodil bulbs. My favorites, however, are hyacinths. They smell heavenly!

And in the background you see snow, lots of it. I love snow, but even I'm starting to tire of it. We've had a total of five feet of snow this winter thus far. Sigh.

Midlife Crises, or Enjoying Our Freedom?

I may not be able to remember why I came into a room sometimes, but being sentimental, I can always remember dates and anniversaries that have been important to me. That’s why I know that six months ago today we closed on the sale of our house.

No big deal to most people. Supposedly the average American moves every five years. Well, not us. We owned only two houses since 1981, and we moved to the second one in 1988. We ordered it from the builder several months before they broke ground, and we watched it go up by driving to the building site every few days until we moved in with our two little kids. We had two more kids while we lived there. It was the scene of many wonderful memories. We loved it a lot.

But last summer we had to sell it. My husband’s business of 12 years died as a result of all the offshoring of his industry to China, and it soon became obvious that either we both had to find jobs (thus no more homeschooling) or we had to move somewhere cheaper. And that’s how we ended up closing on the sale of our house after ten long months on the market, during a week that is now considered to be the beginning of the current credit crunch. We were fortunate to have sold at all. As they say, God is never late but rarely early. No kidding.

I think the part that feels the strangest to me is that we’re now renters after having been homeowners since we were 22. Where I grew up, renters were considered transients. Owning a home was one of those big lifetime milestones from which you didn’t retreat until they carried you out to the retirement home (or the funeral home).

But it’s funny how freeing it can be to rent. Maybe it’s because we became homeowners at such a young age, or maybe we’re having joint midlife crises, but this is fun! As much as I loved fixing up our house and buying things for it, I’m enjoying the amount of time not doing those things has freed up. This is a nice house, but there are no beautiful wood floors or new carpeting as we had in the old house, so I don’t worry about something spilling on or scraping up the floor. I’m not crazy about some of the window treatments, but so what? We’re not going to be here forever, so I can live with them. If the appliances conk out, we just call the property manager. Today the garage door opener went into seizure mode. The guys came and fixed it, and we didn’t get a bill. Nice!

Our rental agreement includes lawn service and snow-plowing. At first, dh had a hard time staying in the house while Lawn Boy did his thing outside. It made him feel lazy. But we’re paying for it in our rent, I kept reminding him. It’ll be interesting to see if he still feels that way this spring when the grass starts growing again.

I especially love not having to watch our property taxes rise every year. A few months ago the new assessment notification for our old house was forwarded to us in the mail. Yes, it went up again…..but it’s not our problem!

I read a lot about how house prices are dropping, and I can imagine that is scary for a lot of people. But it doesn’t affect us, except that someday, we’ll hopefully get a good deal. We thought we would buy again this summer, but now we’re not so sure. We’re praying about it, but neither of us is in much of a hurry to be homeowners again. Unless God puts something irresistible in front of us (or the rent skyrockets), I’m thinking we’ll be here for a while.

There was a time when I would not have been able to handle the uncertainty of where we’re going next. We used to say we liked staying in our rut, it was comfortable there. Now I can see the wisdom of the saying that the difference between a rut and a grave is a few feet. It’s been invigorating to learn about a new place, meet new people and see new sights as we go about our daily lives. Having to sell our house and move to another state was pretty traumatic at the time, no question, but we’re finding this to be an adventure, and looking forward to the future, whether God keeps us here or sends us somewhere else.

Ignorance in Academia

I'm sure glad we're not paying overpriced tuition at UNC-Chapel Hill to finance the salary of a biology professor like Albert Harris. He's the guy who recently told his biology class that babies with Down syndrome should be aborted.

Some of his students had no problem with him sharing that opinion, but others did, including a young woman who has a brother with Down syndrome. Hearing her professor say that made her physically ill, she says.

I completely empathize with her. People who don't have a loved one with special needs are often completely clueless as to what it's like for us to hear other people says cruel things about them.

Several years back, dd24 was working at a cash register when she overheard a customer say about a customer ahead of him who had Down syndrome, "They shouldn't let people like that out in public." My daughter got so mad she had to leave the area (otherwise, I probably would have had to bail her out on an assault charge).

You see, we know what most of society does not: people with Down syndrome are people we love, and they deserve life. Even though their presence in our homes and families often makes life more difficult in some ways, it makes life better in other ways. I can honestly say that our lives are better for having dsds14 in them, and we consider him a gift of God, just like his siblings.

As for Professor Harris, I think he's full of it:

Harris says he wouldn't follow his own moral position.
If he thought his wife was going to have a child with Down syndrome, he would still want to have the baby.
And he faced that situation.
His wife, then 34, was pregnant with their third child when she suffered major bleeding. Doctors told the couple to prepare for the worst.
"If our child had been born with Down syndrome as we expected, we would have cherished her," Harris said.

Beans. There are a lot of situations that can cause the mother to bleed, but Down syndrome isn't one of them, as far as I know. The baby has an extra chromosome, not the power to cause hemorrhaging. The mother must have had some other problem.

And as for "prepare for the worst," some of us see the worst as the death of a baby, not the birth of one with Down syndrome. Geez.

BTW, if you'd like a great, honest read about how God can bless a family by sending a child with disabilities, try The Dance Goes On by Roberta Bandy. We know the Bandy family, and their story is inspiring.

New Carnival of Homeschooling is Up

My husband's grandmother used to teach in a one-room schoolhouse, and her stories of that time were really interesting. Heather over at HomeschoolBlogAwards shares her grandmother's memories of attending a one-room schoolhouse and uses that as a framework for this week's Carnival of Homeschooling. Don't miss it! There are over 50 posts this week.

Gloomy Stats About College and Jobs

I was raised knowing I would go to college, and I did. My parents and I split the cost of it, and I worked throughout my college years to pay for my half. I graduated with no debt.

My dh was also told he would be going to college, and he paid for most of it himself, working summers and coming out of school owing a whopping $1000 or so, which we paid off in a couple of years at $30 a month.

Today, more kids are going to college than ever, but the price of a college education has risen so dramatically that it’s pretty much impossible for someone to work their way through school as we did. As a result, many kids are coming out of school owing tens of thousands of dollars in college loans, plus several thousand more in credit card debt.

If they were making big bucks once they graduated, this would be a problem with a short shelf-life. But wages are stagnating*, and we now have more college graduates than we need for the number of jobs available in this country that require a college degree.

Paul Barton writes about this in the current issue of Change Magazine:

The absolute demand for college graduates is also overstated when whatever percentage of the workforce that has gone to college is equated with the percentage of jobs that require college-level learning—or when the assumption is made that the knowledge gained in college is required to perform that job. For example, Senator Edward Kennedy (D-Mass.), in a committee hearing in March 2007, said that when he graduated from school, just 15 percent of jobs needed some postsecondary training, but "today the number is over 60 percent and rising rapidly." But while over 60 percent of people in existing jobs have "some college" or a postsecondary credential, according to the BLS only about 3 in 10 jobs require a postsecondary certification of some sort.

Yikes! The BLS, of course, is the Bureau of Labor Statistics, the primary source of employment statistics in this country.

Pretty depressing stats, but let’s try being more optimistic: Is there a possibility that there will be more jobs in the future that require a college degree? Sorry, not according to the BLS. Barton includes BLS charts forecasting employment growth in his article, noting that

The jobs that require postsecondary education credentials total 29 percent for 2004 and will rise to 31 percent by 2014.

BTW, the term “postsecondary education” refers not only to four-year and Master’s degrees, but also to two-year degrees and even one-year certificates. So that seems to indicate that the lion’s share of jobs in the future will not require a four-year college degree.

Does this mean your child should not go to college? That depends on the child. Young people who excel in science and want to be neurosurgeons should definitely be encouraged to go to college. But those who don’t know what they want to do, who don’t want to go to college but are feeling pressured by society, or who want to major in a field that doesn’t pay much more than a job at Starbucks might want to head off in a non-college direction, unless you have a money tree in your backyard.

And all young people, whether they go to college or not, should be given a good education in personal finance, because with stagnating wages and rising food and gas prices**, the young people who know how to stretch a dollar will be the best prepared of all.

* the most recent government figures show a 0.1% increase in inflation-adjusted earnings from Nov. 2007 to Jan. 2007. That trend has not varied much over the past ten years.

** current annual inflation rate is over 4% as seen here.

Another Massacre on Valentine's Day

I had just finished writing my last blog post, which mentioned the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, when I heard on the radio that there was a mass shooting this afternoon at Northern Illinois University, which is not far from where we used to live. Last I heard, 18 kids had been shot.

We know many people who have attended NIU, and know someone who goes there now. She's my daughter's friend, who was also homeschooled; as soon as I heard the news, I let my daughter know. She checked on her friend and found out that she was ok, thank God. She was in the next lecture hall over when it happened; everyone in her class piled all sorts of stuff up against the door of their lecture hall and waited half an hour until the police told them it was safe to come out. The only way they learned what was going on was that a few of the kids got online and saw the reports of the shooting.

Right now, all over Chicagoland, terrified parents are trying to get through jammed cell phone lines to make sure their kids at NIU are ok. We're listening to a Chicago tv station over the Internet; they're telling parents how to text their kids at NIU in order to check on them, and they're telling the kids to send their technology-challenged parents a simple text message: I AM OK.

This is so sad. I won't get on my soapbox. All the parents and kids are in my prayers.

Nobody's Perfect

Billy Wilder is one of my favorite film directors. The last two words on his tombstone also happen to be the last two words in one of the best Wilder films, "Some Like It Hot."

I've written about our family's Valentine's Day tradition of a giant heart cookie (recipe here), but in recent years we've established another tradition. Each Valentine's Day, we watch "Some Like It Hot."

You might wonder what the connection is between the movie and the holiday. Well, the plot is put into motion by the infamous St. Valentine's Day Massacre, which took place in the city where I was born and which I lived in or near all my life until last summer: Chicago.

We're not the only ones who love this movie; it was voted #1 funniest film by the American Film Institute (AFI). However, I don't recommend it for children. Teens should be fine, though.

There's A First Time for Everything....

In 20 years of homeschooling, we've never had any issues with the authorities. So when the local sheriff pulled up in front of our house this morning, my very first thought was, "I'm pretty sure I have HSLDA's number near the phone."

It's an eerie feeling to think that after all these years, we could get in trouble for homeschooling. We are new to this state, but we've tried to follow all their rules. Back in Illinois, they didn't care what we did as long as we paid the enormous annual property tax bill that funded the schools. But here in Wisconsin, we had to send the state a letter saying we're homeschooling, and identifying ourselves and our kids by name. As far as I knew, that was all I had to do. Now I was wondering if I missed a deadline or something.

The sheriff rang the bell, then immediately began banging on the door. The kids and I were at the kitchen table working on schoolwork, and we stayed put. My husband answered the door while I held my breath.

"Is X here?"

Big sigh of relief. I recognized the name as that of the person who rented this house before us. My husband explained who we were, and that we occasionally got mail for that person, but had no forwarding address for them. The sheriff thanked him, then left.

I guess that's one way to break up the "school day."

The Illiterate Teacher

The next time someone asks me why I homeschool my kids, I'm going to respond that I want to make sure they're taught by someone who knows how to read and write. Apparently, the public schools can't guarantee that.

Something New

Regular visitors will note something new on the right....new graphics. They were given to me by dd16, who made them for her blog. She very graciously shared them with me.

Those homeschooled kids.... they are just so darn talented :)

An Exclusive Art School

Today might be the first time I've ever wished we lived in Mexico.

The Sunday paper included a story about an art school in Mexico City for adults with Down syndrome. Their artwork is now on tour in Europe.

I love the comments by the Swiss artist and pediatrician who displayed the paintings in a 10-day show in Switzerland:

"I was positively shocked by the beauty of the paintings. It was something like when I saw Klee's paintings for the first time....There's no intellectual filter between what they're expressing and what they're seeing."

She is so right: there is no filter. Dsds14's drawings are so imaginative, and I rarely see him stop to contemplate what he will draw as he works. He gets right down to it, and he knows exactly what he wants to draw.

If I suggest adding something, I'll usually be shot down, unless I catch him in one of his tender moments. But even then, his compliance usually means the end of the drawing, and he'll hand it to me fairly quickly. I know he's thinking, "It's yours now, not mine." Left to his own imagination, he will fill a page with a very detailed drawing. How he would love to go to an art school like the one in Mexico City!

I do know of one adult artist with Down syndrome who has done quite well for himself. His name is Michael Jurogue Johnson, and he has a Web site where he sells his work. I love going there.

Giant Heart Cookie...and Other Goodies for You

I just sent out the February issue of "The Imperfect Homeschooler" newsletter. It includes several goodies, including:

two new articles, "When Cloning Yourself is Not an Option" and

"Resources for Celebrating Presidents Lincoln and Washington,"

some links to great online tools for homeschooling,

"What Our Kids Are Missing Out On Dept."

and, since Valentine's Day is just around the corner,

the story behind our family's Giant Heart Cookie tradition, and the recipe for it, including a printable version.

If you're a subscriber, check your email. If you're not, you can always check out the current (and past) issues here.

Who Cares About History?

Can you identify these three men? Can your kids identify them?

They are, from left, Soviet Premier Josef Stalin, U.S. President Harry Truman and British Prime Minister Winston Churchill at the Potsdam Conference in Germany in 1945. They met to discuss how to deal with post-Nazi Germany in the aftermath of WWII.

As prime minister, Churchill inspired the Allied Forces to stay the course and fight the Nazis in a bloody war that left parts of England in shambles due to air attacks by the Germans. He was revered in Britain for his efforts.

But that was then. A new study finds that 20% of British teens do not believe Winston Churchill ever existed. Then again, nearly two-thirds of them think King Arthur was a real person. Guess we Americans aren't the only ones dealing with a dumbed-down culture.

Here's one historian's take on the study:

Historian Correlli Barnett said: "This suggests a complete lack of common sense and respect for our greatest heroes of the past."
"Churchill and Wellington were great men, but this suggests we no longer value people of great achievement.
"It's all about celebrities and popular culture. What it also tells us is what is going wrong in our school curriculums.
"Something must be completely lacking in our national education that people could be so ignorant as to think these people never actually existed.

Reliving History

What a great idea for a blog. A British man is posting all of his grandfather's letters, written while he was a soldier during World War I, exactly 90 years to the day since each was written. His grandfather's name was Harry Lamin.

The letters are posted without editing or spelling corrections. Just to give you some perspective, Harry's son, who was an infant when his dad went off to war, is now 90 and lives in a nursing home in England.

Keeping up with this blog would make a great history project for young homeschoolers.

You CAN Teach Your Children to Write

I’m amazed by the number of homeschooling moms I know who are intimidated by the thought of teaching their children to write. I think the long, dragged-out process of learning to write in grammar and high school gave them the idea that learning to write is a major endeavor.

But let’s face it; there are many school subjects that take way too long to learn in school, because school is nothing if not inefficient. One teacher trying to lead a group of children in a certain direction will tell you it can be a little like herding cats. Each child learns uniquely, has different interests and may or may not want to be there. That makes it pretty hard to tailor the instruction to fit all of their needs. So it takes a long time to teach a process like writing in school.

We homeschoolers don’t have that disadvantage. We have time with our kids, and we know them better than any teacher can know them. Given that we’re free of the restraints of school, teaching our kids to do something as basic as write in their native language should be easy, right?

Well, not according to those intimidated homeschooling moms I mentioned. They lack confidence in tackling the job of teaching their children to write. Some believe that they are not good writers themselves.

A quick trip around the homeschooler blogosphere will dispel that notion. There are many good writers out there! You all need to have more confidence in yourselves :)

However, even if you’re not the world’s greatest writer, you can still provide your children with the tools that will enable them to become good writers. You can also prepare yourselves to teach your kids to write.

We have a special report, “Teaching Your Children to Write,” that we usually sell at homeschool conventions. But we’ve run out of copies, and we’re taking this year off of the convention circuit anyway. So if you’d like to print out your own free copy of that report, just go here. I hope reading it will help you realize that you don’t have to fear teaching your children to write.

Homeschool Trivia

Question: which television family was the first homeschooling family on tv? Here's a clue: this show premiered over 40 years ago.

You'll find the answer to this question plus more homeschool trivia here.

A Life Worth Living

Amy has something absolutely awesome at her blog. I told her I think everyone should see it. So go there now!

Where Do You Buy Your Books?

So the proof copy of my new book arrived here yesterday, and it was wonderful to see it in print (part of it has been an eBook up until now). There are still a few little things to be worked out, but all in all I'm pretty happy with it.

This book will be available through Amazon. We used to sell Life Prep through Amazon, but they kept cutting the price so low that it was hurting our catalog customers, which is not something we want to do. So we pulled it from Amazon a while back. This time we will set it up so we have more control over the price.

I'm wondering, when given a choice, do most homeschoolers buy books from Amazon or from homeschool catalogs like Rainbow Resource, Book Peddler or CBD? What do you do?

Defending Life

Good thing this little fella's parents ignored doctors' recommendations to abort him because of his problems, which include "water on the brain, a hole in the heart and pyloric stenosis."

My cousin's daughter was born with hydrocephaly; she is now a teenager and doing fine. My own son, almost 15, was born with a hole in his heart. It closed up on its own. And I had pyloric stenosis when I was born, and I'm still kickin' at age.....well, let's just say it's been a while. :)

My favorite line of this article is:

"Just to have had him alive for a few hours would have been better than not giving him the chance of life."

It's Not Over Yet

There are three days left of Barnes & Noble's Educator Appreciation Week, when homeschoolers (along with other educators) get 25% off books (except reference and text books)and 10% off music and DVDs.

The discount is only applied to items used for teaching purposes (which makes me wonder why you can't use it on textbooks and reference books), but if you're looking for something new to add to your homeschool routine, now's the time. (You will need an ID proving you're a homeschooler, and a B&N educator discount card, which you can get this week if you don't already have one.

You can find the nearest Barnes & Noble here.

I Am Not Making This Up......

So the debacle that is public education has come down to this:

You run the public schools in your county. There are quite a few kids who aren't doing well in your schools. Their test scores stink, so you recommend they take after-school tutoring, and they refuse. What else can you do?

You bribe them, to the tune of $8/hour. And if their grades then go up? You pay them bonuses, of course.

You know, I occasionally told my kids (when they were young) that it was their job to learn. It never occurred to me to pay them to do so.

"Locking a Nation Into Permanent Childhood"

Here's Vin Suprynowicz's latest column, where he describes the origins of today's version of public school and why it's inappropriate for our country. His primary source in this article is none other than John Taylor Gatto, former New York State Teacher of the Year turned homeschool advocate.

This column itself is a great introduction to Gatto's book The Underground History of American Education. You can read Gatto's book online for free (although I own it and recommend buying a print copy). You'll find the link to the free online version in Vin's column.

Dissing Phonics

Here's more evidence that you can't always believe so-called experts:

LEADING Australian education experts continue to reject scientific evidence that teaching phonics improves reading skills in children.
The latest results from a seven-year Scottish study show that children taught how to put sounds together to read words, called synthetic phonics, had significantly better reading skills than their peers taught using analytic phonics, breaking whole words into their constituent sounds.
But eminent Australian literacy researcher Allan Luke, from the Queensland University of Technology, questions the validity of using evidence-based research in assessing teaching methods. Professor Luke, a former director-general of the Queensland Education Department and ministerial adviser on education, has dismissed scientific studies showing the benefit of phonics.

Phonics has been taught with great success for many years. My mother taught me to read at age three using phonics. Homeschoolers everywhere have had great success with phonics. To say that phonics does not improve reading skills is just ludicrous.

That said, we should not assume other methods aren't any good. I used phonics to teach my first three children to read, but when it came to #4, phonics just wasn't working. His severe speech delays made it impossible for him to make the necessary sounds. That's why I used a sight reading program with him (Teaching Reading to Children with Down Syndrome by Patricia Oelwein). We still use the techniques in that book along with some phonics now that my son is older.

No single method works for everyone; it depends on the child. One of the great things about homeschooling is that you can tailor the methods to the child.

It's a Weird World.....

Thirty years from now, when today's generation of male infants is grown, won't those young men be thrilled by baby photos of themselves wearing these?

The Queen and Me

So, what do I have in common with the Queen of England? Apparently, she's frugal, too. She doesn't want to replace her 40-year-old tv set with a new model, because her old one works fine. How cool is that?

My favorite part of that article is this comment made by the reporter:

You can have the most expensive television set on the planet, but it will not make the programmes you watch any better. The 36in Jamie Oliver is as bad as the 12in Jamie Oliver. Worse, if anything.
Or you can buy the most advanced satnav system and still get stuck behind a tractor.
The sense of progress is nine-tenths illusory. Novelty for the sake of novelty brings stresses in its wake.

No kidding....

Two Great Carnivals This Week

Starting to feel a bit better...I've got just enough energy to go blog-surfing. In addition to this week's Carnival of Homeschooling, which is always good, I've found a new carnival: Make It From Scratch. This particular edition is based on Little House in the Big Woods by Laura Ingalls Wilder, a book I read with each of my girls some years back. (We have the whole series; I can't bear to give them up.)

We're supposed to be getting six inches of snow plus high winds over the next day and a half, so I'm looking forward to burrowing in and reading a lot of great posts when I'm not doing school or working :)

The WSJ Speaks Up for Homeschooling

James Taranto of the Wall Street Journal says what we homeschoolers have been saying all week in "Scapegoating Home-Schoolers." Be sure to check out his article for more info on the supposedly homeschooling mom who allegedly killed her four daughters; more details have emerged, and none of them have to do with homeschooling.

I Think I'll Have More Tylenol With My Whine......

Waah, I don't feel good.

I just want to curl up in a ball and cry, "Mommmmy!" But I'm the mommy around here.

I've been fighting this bug since Saturday, when I first felt the telltale sore throat. Yesterday I rallied enough (i.e. pumped full of meds) to make it to an appointment at the bank, and pushed myself to do school and work. Today, I finally gave in and did nothing.

School for dd16 was watching "Sense and Sensibility" with me all morning. For dsds14, it was assembling and painting a wooden car in the office with Dad's help.

Dd16 made tuna salad for lunch and a chocolate-frosted layer cake for dessert tonight. Dh made chicken-fried rice for dinner, and did the dishes.

I didn't even work today, not trusting my fuzzy brain to proofread my new book, which is supposed to be headed to the printers very soon. I finally took my shower at 4, then snoozed in my recliner for a few minutes.

It's not often that I just abdicate like this and let the chips fall where they may, but considering how well my family manages, I should do it more often, don't you think?

Homeschooling Makes Headlines.....Sometimes

Today's New York Times has a hit piece on homeschooling that's sure to have repercussions, and not good ones.

A Washington, D.C. woman is charged with murdering her four daughters, and the writer of this article claims the fact that the woman was homeschooling the children allowed her to stay under the social services radar for many months while she held the children hostage and eventually killed them. (Do note the prominence of homeschooling in the headline.)

There are so many flaws in this article. First off, just because someone claims to be homeschooling their children means nothing. This mother also claimed the children died in their sleep because they were possessed by demons, so how can the reporter believe anything she says? The reporter is just using one sad and ugly situation to tar all homeschoolers. Her ultimate goal is to perpetuate the liberal belief that all families need to be under the scrutiny of social services. This is what happens in a society where we look to government for everything.

Ultimately, lazy reporters like Jane Gross of the NYT make themselves look bad even as they unfairly blame homeschooling for cases of child abuse. Had Ms. Gross stepped away from her agenda and done some actual research, she would have learned, as this reporter did, that the family's problems began last February, when the father died of cancer and the mother freaked out. Social services was involved at that time but gave up when the mother chased off a police officer by claiming to be homeschooling the children, including the eldest who attended school until March. Family members also tried to help the mother with her problems but she refused them. This whole situation is a tragedy, but to suggest homeschooling had anything to do with it is disingenous.

The downside of the rise of homeschooling is that, as the concept has become well-known, a few deceitful parents have found it convenient to say they're homeschooling when they're not. The reporter should know by now that some people are using the freedom homeschoolers have to cover up something. But you don't take away everyone's freedom just because there are a few people abusing that freedom. Homeschooling parents who fought for that freedom in the '70s and '80s must find stories like this especially frustrating.

Those same parents might be interested in another story about homeschooling, one that hasn't gotten nearly as much publicity as the Washington, D. C. situation. Schools in several states have become prohomeschooling, but for self-serving reasons. Some parents are actually being told to homeschool their children by their children's schools, which are pushing the children out in an effort to raise their schools' aggregate test scores; see Susan's fine post on "pushouts" at Corn and Oil. (Knowing first-hand the kind of dedication that goes into homeschooling your children, I find it hard to believe these parents can muster the motivation, since homeschooling wasn't their idea in the first place.) How interesting that we're not seeing this story in the headlines.

The Homeschoolers' School Bus

Since we are new to the area, I put out an email to the homeschool group we joined asking to hear from anyone who has a blog, so I can get to know them in cyberspace. The first response I got was from Kari, who just started blogging a few months ago but has obviously picked it up quickly.

Among other things, she has several interesting posts about the school bus she and her husband bought and are turning into a camper. I found it so interesting! Like me, she is blessed with a very handy husband.

Austen Alert!

We've been here nearly five months now, with no television access besides one fuzzy local channel, and it hasn't been an issue so far. It helps that the lone channel we get is NBC, so we were able to watch "The Office," the current favorite around here until the writer's strike hit and the series went into reruns. We've watched only DVDs since then.

And that wasn't a problem until yesterday, when I learned that PBS' Masterpiece Theatre will begin a new series this Sunday: adaptations of Jane Austen's six novels, plus a show about her life. Dd16 and I are now urging the technological expert in our house (AKA Dad) to please reconfigure the antenna in hopes of snagging PBS.

The Chicken States Her Case

My husband took this shot on New Year's Eve when we brought our visiting son and daughter-in-law over to the state park down the road from our house. The red building in the foreground is an ice-fishing shack. (If you've seen "Grumpy Old Men," you know what it looks like inside.)

So, yes, we were standing on ice, a short distance from the shore, and if you look way out past the red ice-fishing shack, on its right, you will see many more shacks farther out into the bay. (Note the snowmobile tracks heading out there.)

Being a monumental chicken, this was as far out into the bay as I was willing to walk. Dh wanted to walk out past the red shack but I convinced him not to. In defense of my fearfulness, I'd like to point out that the area of trees to the left of the ice shack is an island, and here is what that island (foreground) looked like the last time I saw it, back in October:

I absolutely love it up here, but even if I spend the rest of my life living here, no one is ever going to get me way out there on the ice. The question is, how do I keep dh from trying it? You know how men are.....sigh.

Homeschoolers for Whom?

Finally had a chance to surf the blogosphere today and I noticed an alarming trend. Some bloggers are sporting graphics that proclaim "Homeschoolers for Huckabee," "Homeschoolers for Paul," or "Homeschoolers for Obama."

I don't have a problem with people proclaiming their presidential preferences. What bugs me is that they're using their homeschool status to do so. There's no connection between homeschooling and political preference, no matter what these people, including HSLDA, want to believe.

Homeschoolers are wonderfully diverse. Get a random group of them together and the only thing you can be sure of is that they're very concerned with the upbringing of their children, so much so that they sacrifice years of their lives to provide them with an atmosphere conducive to their children's propensity to learn.

So please, bloggers, proclaim your preference all you want, but stop suggesting that homeschoolers as a group are going to vote for any one specific candidate. Personally, I don't think it's worth trying to convince other people to go with your candidate anyway. Your time is better spent praying that God sends America the president we need and not the president we deserve. Otherwise, we could end up with someone like this:

A Graphic Challenge

I'll admit right up front that I'm technologically challenged....in fact, it's a miracle that I've managed to get two blogs off the ground over the past three years. No matter how easy they make it for me, I can usually overcomplicate the process.

Maybe you're not like me and you actually have the gift of technological competence. Maybe you even have artistic talent. If so, you should check out a contest sponsored by the Cates, initiators of the Carnival of Homeschooling. They're looking for entries for a graphic for the Carnival of Homeschooling. If you enter, let me know. I'd love to see the graphic you design!

They Learned By Example

As I’ve written elsewhere, we homeschooling parents teach a hidden curriculum that goes beyond the math and writing books we buy to use with our children. When we live with our children 24/7, we continually teach them about life…by our example.

This might be a daunting thought, but it’s an inescapable fact. When you’re with your children day in and out during their growing years, they’ll take their cues for handling life from you and the example you set.

I’m thinking about this today because we just spent several days with our son and his wife, AKA the newlyweds. They're not brand new newlyweds, having recently celebrated their six-month anniversary :) But to old fogies like us, they’re newlyweds.

This morning, as they were packing up for the 10-hour drive back to their new home, it struck me how well they work together. They very efficiently put the sofa bed back together, found their belongings and gifts, and packed up their car. Over the five days they were here, I had noticed several times that they work as a team.

This may sound very matter-of-fact, but not all married people behave that way. I remember back to our pre-children years, when my husband and I took a trip to Michigan to stay with my grandmother for a few days. We had a great visit with her. As we were leaving, she said to us, “I’m so happy to see you two working as a team. I never had that with Louie.”

When Gram was a young mother, she threw her husband out because he wouldn’t stop gambling away his paycheck (when he wasn’t using it to buy a round of drinks at the corner tavern most paydays). She told him she didn’t need a fifth child, and that he should get out if he wasn’t going to bring home his pay to feed their children. That’s how she ended up a 20-something single mom of four (during the Great Depression, no less). Gram had a very hard life raising my dad and his siblings to adulthood on her own. She would have much preferred to work as a team, but her husband was not interested.

Gram was right about us. We have always been a team. God has really blessed me with a husband who will do whatever needs to be done. When I was floundering, trying to homeschool three children plus care for our developmentally disabled toddler, he even quit his job and started a business from home so he could help me with the kids and the house. Our newlywed son was nine at that time; I believe the example he saw of us working together on a daily basis for the past 13 years was his “course” on marriage.

This is not to say that homeschooling your children is the only way to set a good example for them in the marriage arena. Our new daughter-in-law was not homeschooled. However, she is a child of long-married Christian parents, and this certainly shows in her demeanor as part of a newly married team. She obviously learned from the example set by her parents.

It’s no secret that it’s been hard for me to let go of my kids. But it certainly makes it easier when I see that the hard work of parenting has borne fruit, and I’ve enjoyed a little taste of that fruit over the past several days as I watched the newest team in our family.

Back Home Again

Not sure how it can be a week since I last posted, but between preparing for Christmas, enjoying Christmas and going back to IL to see relatives, the week has sped past. I hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas.

Lots of thought-provoking stuff happened this past week, but I have to ruminate on it before I'm ready to post. And tomorrow, ds22 and his bride will be arriving for a visit, so I think I'll be pretty busy through New Year's. So for now, I wish you a wonderful New Year's celebration, and a blessed 2008 :)

Take a Quick Break for Something Funny....

I know you all are busy today; around here, we've been making cookies and fudge (it's called Home Ec). So I just want to share something quick and funny that my support group shared with me. Enjoy!

At Least One Candidate Signed It

I don't want to go all political here, but I have to admit I am watching this next presidential election with great interest. If I had to decide today who to vote for, I couldn't do it; it's a moot point anyway, because we don't know who will finally make it to next fall's ballot. As in past presidential elections, I'm praying for the president we need, not the president we deserve.

That said, I find it interesting that one of the current candidates has signed the proclamation of the Alliance for the Separation of School and State. I'm not going to name him (well, now you know who it isn't, lol). You'll have to find out for yourself by going to the Alliance's news page. While you're there, I encourage you to snoop around a bit and discover the purpose of this organization. If you feel so moved, you can sign the proclamation, too.

My Christmas Present to Me

Maybe you know Lizzie. In the blogosphere she goes by the name of "A Dusty Frame." I pop by her blog once in a while and she pops by mine. She's a homeschooling mom of a young son, and her husband is in prison. Wanting to bring in some much-needed income, she decided to try writing and selling an eBook. Specifically, she chose to turn an old Home Ec project into a Christmas cookbook.

Now, even though I write and sell eBooks, I don't buy them. It's hard enough finding time to read the books I drag home from the library. And I certainly don't need another cookbook. I've got quite a few already, plus an overloaded file drawer of recipes torn out of newspapers for the past few decades (seriously....since I got married, so that's 28 years' worth!)

But I wanted to help Lizzie out, so I bought her cookbook. And what I discovered is that I had actually bought myself a pretty nice little Christmas gift. As I told her after examining my purchase, she included recipes that you don't usually find, yummy stuff like Gingerbread Waffles, Breaded Steak, Swedish Brown Beans.....are you getting hungry yet? I am.........and several candy recipes, one of which dd16 and I will be trying VERY soon.

Sprinkled throughout are warm Christmasy sayings and illustrations, plus tips for Christmas projects, including dough ornament recipes. What a great gift this would make for a friend (or yourself)!

If you'd like to check out Lizzie's Christmas cookbook, you'll learn more here. BTW, Lizzie is not paying me to say this, and I don't make money off any sales from this post. I just wanted to share this great little cookbook with you this week, because it's full of Christmas spirit :)

Speaking in Dollars

I've been reading Randy Alcorn's thought-provoking book, Money, Possessions and Eternity, and in it he says something I've never really thought about before.

He discusses how some Christians refuse to purchase the products of companies that support and/or promote activities they disapprove of, and how doing so makes more financial sense than just simply selling any stock they might have in those same companies. He reasons that when you sell stock in the offending company and convince others to do so, you put that stock back on the market at a lower price, which just makes the stock more attractive to someone else, and can actually profit the company. But when you choose not to buy products from the company, it directly affects the company's profits, its bottom line. When large numbers of people choose to boycott a company's products, they can really make an impression on the decision-makers in that company.

So, for example, if you're offended by the anti-Christian bias of the movie "The Golden Compass," (see this month's newsletter for the specifics), it's understandable if you decide to sell any stock you own, including mutual funds, in New Line Cinema, producer of the movie. But to be most effective, you would want to boycott its movies, particularly "The Golden Compass."

While you're at it, you'd probably also want to boycott the companies promoting the movie with their own products. That list includes:

Coca-Cola
Wal-Mart
Target
Borders
Barnes & Noble
Best Buy
Amazon.com
FAO Schwarz
Circuit City
Scholastic

At this time of year, it would be pretty hard to avoid all those companies, particularly if you buy gifts of books or entertainment. And for homeschoolers, it eliminates all the largest sources of new books. But it could be done, if you were really determined; you would also want to notify the companies of your intentions in order to really make your point. Then you could go to local booksellers or homeschool businesses to buy your books, and local stores to buy your entertainment (if Best Buy and Circuit City haven't already forced them out of business.) Just a thought.

An Easy and Worthwhile Writing Assignment

This time of year, there's nothing I like better than easy assignments for my kids. Here's one that's easy and very worth doing: sending a postcard to one of our troops overseas.

Xerox is sponsoring "Let's Say Thanks," a site where you can electronically send a postcard that will be printed out and given to one of our troops around the world. All postcards have been pre-designed by American kids; while there are also prewritten messages we can send, why not have your kids write their own message, choose their own postcard and click "Send"? It's so easy, and teaches them how important it is to say thank you to the men and women who uphold freedom.

Once the messages have been sent, click on the link "From the troops" so you and your children can read the reactions of those who have received one of these messages. You'll be glad you did.

Catching My Breath

Yesterday dd16 and I took a rare day off of school to go Christmas shopping. This is a whole new experience for me, driving an hour to the nearest city to shop. Having lived in the Chicago suburbs all of my life until this summer, I'm used to driving ten minutes in any direction and finding plenty of busy stores, complete with the usual traffic. Now that we're living in a small town, major shopping trips are planned ahead. It's certainly a change. Before, I lived in the middle of the hectic activity. Now, I leave our peaceful little world here and drive an hour to find the activity, which isn't nearly as crazy as the hectic world we left behind in Illinois.

We got a lot done, plus had time to drop in on dd24, who happened to have the day off of work. We had a nice visit. I came home to a to-do list a mile long, but chose instead to take it easy. I didn't used to know how to do that, and I'd just keep pushing myself until I was exhausted. But I've learned over time that it's especially important at this time of year to take breaks here and there. So, instead of working on my new book last night (it's almost ready for the printer!), I watched "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" with dh and dd16 after ds14 went to bed. This movie is the real "Mr. and Mrs. Smith," the Alfred Hitchcock original, and rare in that it is a screwball comedy (the majority of his movies were thrillers, of course).

It's kind of poignant to watch Carole Lombard in this movie, as she would die in a plane crash a year later on her way home from a war bond tour. The movie has a more mature theme than many comedies of that time, but is still pretty funny. Watching this has made me want to watch my very favorite Carole Lombard movie (for the umpteenth time): "My Man Godfrey." I highly recommend it. (Watch it for free here.)

Tonight's break will probably be spent surfing this week's Carnival of Homeschooling; hope to "see" you there!

The Twelve Days of Homeschooling

This is really clever:

On the first day of homeschool, my neighbor said to me.......

The Newsletter is Ready

This month's "The Imperfect Homeschooler" newsletter includes:

two new articles (including part two of "Don't Let Inflation Keep You From Homeschooling"),

links to Christmas puzzles and projects for you and your kids,

and, as always, the "What Our Kids are Missing Out On Dept.,"

plus a few other goodies. Check it out!

Together Again

It's kind of noisy in the dining room just now. Dd24 came over to do her laundry (it's free when you use Mom's washer and dryer) and to hang out with dd16 and ds14, and they're making a gingerbread house from one of those kits every store seems to carry these days.

I love when they can spend time together like this. It reminds me of the days when they were young and all of them still lived at home. At Christmastime, they'd all work together to decorate Christmas cookies, or to make gift tags, or some other Christmas craft. It's hard to find something that everyone can do when your kids span a wide age range like mine do, but whenever they found something to do together, they all had fun.

Ds14 is finally old enough to work with everyone else; when he was young, he'd often just watch, happy to be included in whatever the older kids were doing. Now he's quite opinionated about how to do things, and it's fun to watch.

I often think that homeschooling allowed us to make more than the usual number of memories when the kids were young, but I never realized that growing up together 24/7, with no school attendance intruding on family time, would help them appreciate their time together now that they're grown (or almost grown). Looks like all those years together paid off.

Carnival with a Twist

How well do you know children's literature? Here's your chance to test your knowledge. This week's Carnival of Homeschooling includes "eleven cold and snowy excerpts from children's books." Will you recognize them without being told their titles or authors? See how well you do, and browse a variety of homeschooling posts as your reward.

His Proudest Achievement

It may be that in the next few years I shall discover the cure for cancer, write the great English novel, work out how to transmute base metal into gold, or invent an ingenious in-shoe device that stops the wearer treading in dog poo, even when it's concealed in autumn leaves. But even if I do, the proudest achievement of my life will remain the same: that I taught my children to read.

That's from James Delingpole, a British writer. I love the sentiment he expresses here. He sounds like a dad who has his priorities straight.

It's clear he believes that he's responsible for his children's education. Having seen the British educational system fail at teaching kids to read, he took matters into his own hands and proved that it's not really that hard to do so.

There's another dynamic at work here, though, and that's his pride in teaching his children something as important as learning to read. Parents who take the time to do this are rewarded with the knowledge that they've given their children one of the most important skills they'll ever need. If that's not time well spent, what is?

Still, we live in a world where most people expect to see tangible, material signs of how we spend our time: new cars, big houses, designer clothes. It's important to remind ourselves that those things eventually fall apart, if they don't go out of style first, while investing time in our children gives them lifelong rewards.